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im azimah. im fifteen. im not really anything at all, but i try my best to get up and go. okay and this blog's pretty depressing. articulate links Myspace Multiply Ajie Berg Elmmy♥ Farhan Fhamy Hanes Julz Mondre Naem Nerd Raudhah Ryemie Sakina Sofie backtrack March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 |
Thursday, July 30, 2009
9:26 PM Elmmy,I love you. I love who you are. Im proud of you. I love your flaws and perfections. You make me laugh, you make me cry, you make me angry and you make me so incredibly happy and i love all that. Sometimes you scare me, and i love that too. You make me think, sometimes when i dont want to. Im greatly thankful for that. You are a wonderful, complex human being, and you inspire me to be better, so much better. So i love you. I keep thinking about our first date, and how our palms were sweating, how i was shaking when i gave you one mentos, about how we talked about things so random and how you chased after the last bus home for me, and oh, how i felt all warm and content and happy when i got home. Elmmy i still laugh and smile at myself just thinking about how i kept peeling the skin from your finger cause i wanted your attention. What-the-hell zimah, but i guess i must have done something right cause look where we are now! I know, only coming to about three months, but its really big for me. Never thought this was possible for someone like me. I love it when you wink at me. Like i still get tingles from my toes all the way up to the tip of my head. I still get weird butterflies (and im smiling at the thought of it as im typing this). I love it when you kiss my forehead when i cry and hug me so tight as if i was slipping away. I love it when you push the hair away from my face and look into my eyes when you talk to me. You found me when noone else was looking, and i thank everything that brought you and i together. Seriously i have never been this happy. You opened up my eyes. Everything's much clearer now and im so thankful for that. And Elmmy thank you so much for listening to me, to what i have to say about everything, everything you ever heard about me, about my pasts. I swear im a changed person and i wont ever let you down. I promised. I am really excited to see how our story turns out. I think its going to be a really really really good one. I hope it never ends. Take that, paragraphs! I get 5000 points tyvm :P TOP OF PAGE
Sunday, July 19, 2009
10:23 PM  cheeks too chubbygetting bitten by the elmosquito all the time not really but yeah not fair he bony boy. ): watched HP6 today with mum and dad. was okay. kinda dissappointing though. ok tomorrow i have malay creative writing camp thingy at err i forgot where. awh poop, i end at 6! oh no. i need mo' clothes. oh wait i loved yesterday when elmmy and i went for a picnic but i couldnt take pictures cause my brother borrowed my camera. i took a very gay picture of him with my phone's lousy camera though. contact me if you wanna take a look. :P TOP OF PAGE
9:50 PM because im fatbecause im on medication because im inadequate because im dissatisfied because im crazy because im an idiot because im a bad sister because im a worse daughter because my nose is humongous because my hair annoys me because my nails are weak because i have bad skin because i have bad allergies because i have a disorder because i hate my fucking form teacher because i hate h1n1 for fucking cancelling the drama performance at arts house because i hate my fucking moodswings because i hate fucking running out of fucking money !!!!!!!! TOP OF PAGE
Friday, July 17, 2009
11:15 PM  i hate it when you're mad or feeling sad. sweetie im here. smile for me, i like seeing your teeth. i love your laughter. pretty strange, honestly, but i like it cause its yours. i like surprises, and youre amazingly unpredictable. i love the way you make me laugh til i cant breathe and make my tummy feel like exploding. two months have passed and i still cant believe its happening cause i used to think stuff like this wasnt for me. somehow you managed to pick me up when i was lower than i could ever remember. im a little better as a person than before because of you. im still an idiot now but im making progress cause i used to be an asshole. i know its hard but you'll get through this, just keep holding my hand tightly and i promise you'll be alright because it broke my heart watching you hurt and that made me realise i would do anything to protect you, or make things okay again. we're going to be alright hun, i still wake up every morning wanting the first thing i see to be you. although i get my moodswings sometimes, i try my best to give you all i can because i dont want to fuck this up. oh and sometimes its just the medicine im taking that's causing the moodswings, bear with me on this okay? so now tell me, whats first in your list? TOP OF PAGE
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
7:02 PM Note to self; Never highly expect/look forward to something until you start dreaming about it. Mood swing? Not quite. I'm busy. No time for big updates. TOP OF PAGE
Sunday, July 12, 2009
1:38 AM Hi,my neck hurts and i cant breathe and my heart's beating real fast suddenly now. again, 3rd time today. like weirdo. eeee. weirdo. eeee. didnt get to see fireworks. i like fireworks. oh well. im sleepy. TOP OF PAGE
Saturday, July 11, 2009
2:22 AM ive been needing this a lot lately. but tonight i need this now. goodnight. TOP OF PAGE
1:26 AM Damn I wish stuff like this were possible in Singapore. Oh foo.I would sit up there at night alone watching the stars watch me. But it would be great if you'd watch them with me too. Okay im dead beat from today. Elmmy and I went out to watch The Haunting In Connecticut and it was good, but not great. Then we chilled at a secret place where all secrecy is secret. And then we left for home since it was getting late. Woohoooo so much Elmmy in my veins, i've been meeting him up in the morning before we both went to school i love this. Plans this weekend got fucked up real bad. Like eee dont like. Oh well like i said in a post way back, i cant look forward for something too much. ): But Elmmy you know what i said. Its been a really long time. Anyway, I dont know what's gotten into me recently but its scaring the shit out of me and only my parents, my classmates and Elmmy knows what happened and im planning to keep it on the down low. Apparently its cause it happened at home and at school and well i just needed to tell Elmmy. Moving on. School's been fine, Ive been good. Theres a new cafe, but still kental. Schoolmates getting very annoying. Well, some of them. Ew. Oh and i had octopus balls thingy for the first time ever just now (the Tako Pachi thingy), and omg i love it hahahahahahaha and i ate weird food today. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee fireworks tomorrow! TOP OF PAGE
Sunday, July 5, 2009
11:50 PMWhat did I do to you? Nothing, I gave my all. Something in you has changed. Time for you to face reality, you're stuck on yourself. The best of the best just became the worst of the worst. Suck it up. Okay maybe youre just too fucking blind to see that the stones you stepped on to get to the top have turned to dust. Go fucking kiss someone else's ass. So fucking sick of this. But I already knew shit like this was bound to happen. Its so fucking typical. Haha I've been nice and I get stepped on? Who the fuck are you kidding? You dont know me well enough to start talking about me. So just fucking shut up and save it for someone who would actually give a fuck. I've been through this so many times before already so im pretty numbed right now and i wouldnt feel a thing if something swung back at me. Ive lost so much because of this already. Haha woah damn sometimes i hate being nice. Then again, being nice all the time doesnt pay off. Lets just say i dont give a flying fuck anymore for what you have to say. Because right now, youre shit to me until the day you die. (: Dont bother asking. Turning in, au revoir! TOP OF PAGE
11:42 PM yeah we got married. psyche. im sorry. i couldnt think of anything to blog about. .... OK NOW I DO. TOP OF PAGE
Friday, July 3, 2009
12:23 AM " How could i have ever said i felt so alone,when the world's right here with me wherever i go? TOP OF PAGE |
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